Thoughts on mortality

A few weeks ago a friend of ours described symptoms that were suggestive of angina. We advised him to see his doctor. A couple of weeks later when we met up again, he'd done nothing about it so, having a bit of medical knowledge, we took it on ourselves to give him a stern lecture on the need for investigation and possible outcomes if he didn't. Fortunately he listened to us and after several tests he's been found to have narrowing of his coronary arteries, has been started on medication and is awaiting angioplasty.

This has got me thinking about how we view ourselves and also the nature of friendship. Although the circumstances were a little different Mr Mogs and I went through the same thing a few years back when he was diagnosed with heart disease. Nothing prepares you for it. We live our lives expecting, indeed knowing that our bodies will do all we ask of them ( apart perhaps during the odd hangover!) , after all my body is ME, not something separate. To find its been quietly deteriorating without giving any warning is a huge shock that takes a long time to come to terms with. Although Mr Mogs had physical symptoms to accommodate, the overwhelming disability the diagnosis brought was psychological. It took over a year to acknowledge that although he'd had this diagnosis he was well on treatment and could start to look forward to the rest of his life instead of fearing he was going to drop dead any moment or become an invalid. As this blog shows life is very satisfying with many new horizons to explore. BUT how to help people going through this, or to prepare you beforehand? I don't know the answer, everyone just has to muddle through on their own. I just hope our experience will help our friend.

Which brings me on to the nature of friendship. Although a friend, we have not known him long and hence not all that well. He's more than an aquaintance but we couldn't have been considerd close before. That's changed now. We may have saved his life, possibly averted a heart attack and certainly got him proper medical care quicker than if he'd been left to his own devices. In a way it's a nice feeling but also it isn't. I don't want him to feel in our debt. It's nice that he's grateful now but in a situation like this how do you stop being grateful? You can't just say thanks and that's the end of it. Whatever we do in future it's going to be in the background. I suppose in films something dreadful would happen to us and he'd rescue us and the debt would be repaid. Real life's not like that. It'll be interesting how things pan out. Nonetheless I'm going to enjoy a closer friendship with him and his family

Elvie